After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
Randomize
