Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
