I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
