come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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