I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
Randomize
