Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
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