I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Randomize
