ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
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