Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize