We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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