And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
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Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
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Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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