Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize