are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I'm going to jail i love you
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Randomize