we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
