I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
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Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
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Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
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