And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
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