Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
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