god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize
