Sponge bath it is.
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Randomize
