Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize