Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Randomize