But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Is it penis luge time yet?
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Randomize
