It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Randomize