Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Randomize