i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
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