So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
I have tasted many bathrooms
Randomize
