After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
