You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Randomize
