When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
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