no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
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