I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
