i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
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