Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
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