Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Randomize
