did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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