Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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