Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
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