Texts From Last Night

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  (310): View more from California

  Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.

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  (310): Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary. http://tfl.nu/o8eq
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.

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  (902): The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling. http://tfl.nu/4suj
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.

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  (732): I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv. http://tfl.nu/27sr
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  (949): View more from California

  you made cement angels. it was a great sight.

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  (949): you made cement angels. it was a great sight. http://tfl.nu/etc6
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  (813): View more from Florida

  I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.

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  (813): I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester. http://tfl.nu/cawp
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.

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  (412): thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out. http://tfl.nu/825u
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job

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  (519): he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job http://tfl.nu/3g10
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.

  (864): View more from South Carolina

  And I meant every ounce of it.

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  (978): You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands. (864): And I meant every ounce of it. http://tfl.nu/062o
  Replies (7) Good night (1195) Bad night (2104)
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.

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  (484): deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board. http://tfl.nu/f3ak
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Why didn't I see you last night!?

  (1-203): View more from Connecticut

  We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.

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  (203): Why didn't I see you last night!? (1-203): We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you. http://tfl.nu/iqgq
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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.

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  (843): Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend. http://tfl.nu/a6e8
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  How much did you drink?

  (708): View more from Illinois

  Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea

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  (630): How much did you drink? (708): Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea http://tfl.nu/hfkt
  Replies (2) Good night (1073) Bad night (558)
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  (252): View more from North Carolina

  I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds

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  (252): I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds http://tfl.nu/g7b7
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.

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  (+61): I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in. http://tfl.nu/ilgv
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  (916): View more from California

  Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?

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  (916): Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick? http://tfl.nu/xs5h
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