does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
23 People Reveal The Worst Culture Shock They’ve Ever Experienced While Traveling
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
27 People Confess Their Proudest Fap
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.