I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
