Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
