so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Randomize
