I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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