five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
