Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Randomize
