I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
Randomize
