did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
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