He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
