____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
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