i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I got inside last night via doggy door
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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