Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize