you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
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