dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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