Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(510): View more from California

I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.

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(339): View more from Massachusetts

i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall

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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.

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(360): View more from Washington

i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.

(1-360): View more from Washington

oh. my. god. yes.

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(908): View more from New Jersey

We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow

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(573): View more from Missouri

I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.

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(303): View more from Colorado

Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.

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(630): View more from Illinois

YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF

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(801): View more from Utah

my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.

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