Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
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I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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